Forums / Off Topic / Hospital Horrors (funny)

I work at a Hospital as a nurse. Some of the things I run into day to day make me smile as I lay down to sleep at night.
1) A man comes into our ER with an STP (oil treatment) bottle up his A$$. (literally)!! His wife is crying as she sits in the bedside chair, saying "I thought all of this was behind him" (obviously this guy had this to happen to him multiple times by his recent notes in the chart) and without hesitation our doctor grins and says "well it was behind him, that's why he was here" The look on her face = Priceless.
Another time we had a woman to come in "hung up" with a german shepherd. She lovingly had him and herself wrapped up in a long black trench coat (for the dogs humility I'm sure).
Once we removed a dead gerbil from a man's anus. His gay lover stated that they had inserted a pipe, and released the gerbil. After 2 hours of waiting, it never returned. (F.Y.I I truely hated this case).
We've had a woman in the E.R. not once, not twice, but 3 times for removale of a D Cell battery from the vagina.
Here's the one that really made me say WOW. A guy comes in complaining of painful urination and says he suspects a "foreign object". Upon further review of the C.T. Scan by our humerous physician. It was discovered this gentlemen had a crayon in his bladder. (yep, he'd pushed it up into the down pipe a bit too far)

Any of you all have things this funny happening in your day to day life?? I've got a millon more...lol