Forums / Off Topic / Last call?

2 years 49 weeks ago, 10:57 PM

Saint J.M. Browning

Saint J.M. Browning's picture

Rank:
General
Points:
3561
Join Date:
Feb 2011
Location:
The Colony, Texas, United States
Last call?

What happened? I pour a drink and join the party and everybody goes home? Do I smell?

OK, well since it looks like the place is dead and I still got a little whiskey left, I'll share a little tale with y'all. This is about the benefits of age (experience) over youthful exuberance.

When I was a younger man, I enjoyed the atmosphere of the gentleman's club. Now, of course, being a young buck, I was sure that every girl in that joint in fact "wanted me", and I was somewhere between superman and Jesus (forgive my blasphemy).

Over the years, after having learned many life lessons and had my feet put on the ground by them, as well as having friends as well as a friend with benefits that were strippers, my understanding of such establishments is much more close to reality.

And, while I can still enjoy such a place for what it is, I rarely go. But now I have more fun than just seeing tits and having a drink. It was great (and somewhat liberating) the first time I went with this mindset. I was at a friend's bachelor party. We were at a table having a good time, when one of the girls was making her rounds between performances.

She came to me and asked if I minded her sitting down and talking. I told her to feel free, and she sat in my lap and started to talk to me.

She was working it good too, I have to admit. Wriggling her ass on my lap just enough to not be obvious, but enough to keep my attention. And, of course there was the obligatory brush with her breasts across my chest, arm, cheek from time to time.

All the while we're sitting there talking, and I'm drinking my beer. When the waitress comes by and asks if I need another. I tell her I do, and the girl on my lap asks if I'm going to buy her a drink.

I tell her I don't have any money, and one of my buddies is covering the tab. Without a word, she gets up and walks off. As she strolls away, I yell out to her, "Wait, don't you want to talk no more?"

lol, Good times.

"I don't think Hank done it this way" - Waylon
2 years 49 weeks ago, 1:08 AM

luckybychoice

luckybychoice's picture


Rank:
Secretary of the Treasury
Points:
6793
Join Date:
May 2009
Location:
United States
tijauana?

:)

i tried being reasonable,i didn't like it, NRA LIFE MEMBER,USMC VETERAN
2 years 49 weeks ago, 4:49 AM

Vaquero

Vaquero's picture

Rank:
General of the Army
Points:
5502
Join Date:
Dec 2009
Location:
West Texas
Gentleman's clubs

Rarely do you find an actual gentleman. Ask me how I know. LOL
I aint been in a titty bar in decades. Last time I went it was pretty much what SJMB described.

The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth!
2 years 49 weeks ago, 8:13 AM

HampsterW

HampsterW's picture

Rank:
Secretary of State
Points:
7723
Join Date:
Jan 2010
Location:
Cottonwood Heights, Utah, United States

for a married man is the titty bar.....It's those 'meat markets' that a wife should worry about. I used to go on occasion with coworkers when my company was located in downtown SLC but not often, I was never real fond of giving my money away and the caliber of the patrons tended to be low at best...

Change you can truly believe in comes from the barrel of a gun---------------------------------------------------------------------------------Ron Paul 2012----Vote the bastards out!---------------------------------
2 years 49 weeks ago, 11:50 AM

leanneshu

leanneshu's picture

Rank:
Brigadier General
Points:
308
Join Date:
Dec 2011
Location:
Peoria, Arizona, United States
safest place

Well, I know why they keep'em dark and a drink in ur hand......beer googles!

2 years 49 weeks ago, 8:18 AM

Saint J.M. Browning

Saint J.M. Browning's picture

Rank:
General
Points:
3561
Join Date:
Feb 2011
Location:
The Colony, Texas, United States
tijuana

No, LBC, I'm pretty sure if I did that in Tijuana, I'd get a good ass-beating at best. Or get dead at the worst.

"I don't think Hank done it this way" - Waylon
2 years 49 weeks ago, 10:10 AM

samD

samD's picture

Rank:
President
Points:
15597
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Green Valley, Free State of Arizona, United States
St Jim

That Jesus you mentioned is like Jesus Morales Frijolle Mesa....

2 years 49 weeks ago, 10:12 AM

samD

samD's picture

Rank:
President
Points:
15597
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Green Valley, Free State of Arizona, United States

like a good rib joint.

2 years 49 weeks ago, 10:40 AM

Jeffashbyjr

Jeffashbyjr's picture

Rank:
Lieutenant General
Points:
826
Join Date:
May 2010
Location:
The boonies outside of pensacola, Fl, United States

Is that the beer is always cheaper and the view is always nice

If you carry a gun, people call you paranoid. Nonsense! If you have a gun, what do you have to be paranoid about?
2 years 49 weeks ago, 10:45 AM

clintlebo

clintlebo's picture


Rank:
General
Points:
2311
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
land, of confusion, United States
jeffashbyjr

stay away from washington state then. Beer not served in strip clubs here...

clint

"Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us." (Calvin & Hobbes)
2 years 49 weeks ago, 11:30 AM

greg az

greg az's picture

Rank:
Secretary of Homeland Security
Points:
5873
Join Date:
Oct 2009
Location:
New York, NY, Rwanda
AZ has the same laws..

No alcohol in total nude places.. For some reason they seemed a little "odd" to me.. Not a relaxing attitude at all.. and huge price to get in the door.. nope not for me..

Jeff.. i've never noticed the beer prices being cheaper.. course its been a couple decades since i've been in one.. sheesh... what kind of son-n-laws do i have huh.. bunch o lops.

a man has to hold his word, hold his beliefs, and hold a good sight picture.
2 years 49 weeks ago, 11:15 AM

Saint J.M. Browning

Saint J.M. Browning's picture

Rank:
General
Points:
3561
Join Date:
Feb 2011
Location:
The Colony, Texas, United States
no beer????

Then what do you do to keep you hands of your crotch?

"I don't think Hank done it this way" - Waylon
2 years 49 weeks ago, 11:22 AM

HampsterW

HampsterW's picture

Rank:
Secretary of State
Points:
7723
Join Date:
Jan 2010
Location:
Cottonwood Heights, Utah, United States
No beer

UT has a couple of totally nude clubs where no alcohol is allowed and none of them serve the hard stuff, just beer.

Change you can truly believe in comes from the barrel of a gun---------------------------------------------------------------------------------Ron Paul 2012----Vote the bastards out!---------------------------------
2 years 49 weeks ago, 11:25 AM

greg az

greg az's picture

Rank:
Secretary of Homeland Security
Points:
5873
Join Date:
Oct 2009
Location:
New York, NY, Rwanda

St j.. I felt sorry for ya in here by yourself last night.. typed out a long thing about taking my dad to a joint in Tucson.. then lost the whole page.. frustrating

Hamp is right.. Married guys safer in a Tbar than in the local safeway.. Guess when your being mauled by every tom dick and harry, you don't feel like hitting on John..

Stories not as good as the one about pop, but since its got guns, and Tbars it'll have to do, when i first arrived in Tucson it was legal to take a gun into a bar.. didn't happen except in fore mentioned establishments.. better places would just sorta look at you..

Tbars, and all bike bars were the same.. checked it at the bar.. some had wood dowels on the wall behind the bar.. most just put them under the bar. Place out on the I10 frontage road on the far north end of Tucson had gotten my attention as it always had a bunch of bikes in front of it, so this was my first official "stop"..

Female bar tender i walk in and first thing she does is look at my holster..holds her hand out.. no high.. how are ya.. kiss my A.. nothing just a flat hand.. i hand her my revolver she takes it and places under the bar..

Now she's a friendly bartender, sat there for a couple hours and watched her drill.. she cleared autos like a marine drill instructor..First class..didn't do anything with revolvers, but dropped the magazine, and cycled slide on autos. then put the gun and magazine together under the bar..

I compliment her on this..(two hours in a bar I compliment anyone) She tells me thats a new "drill" for her..she didn't always clear auto's but after BF taught her to shoot she started, and noticed her tips were better..There has to be some free market stuff in here as well..but settle for Tbar and guns.

a man has to hold his word, hold his beliefs, and hold a good sight picture.

Who's Online

Guns Lot Activity
Users
Currently Active Users: 1048 (0 members and 1048 guests)

Guns Lot Statistics
Stats Topics: 8,688, Comments: 161,600, Members: 23,517
Welcome our newest member: Hank6046

Recent Activity