Forums / Off Topic / Lawyer Hunting Regulations, an oldy but goodie Back Again

5 years 3 weeks ago, 6:52 PM

daisycutter

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Location:
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Regulations For
Hunting Attorneys
(Bill to Regulate the Hunting and Harvesting of
Attorneys PC 370.00)
370.01 Any person with a valid instate
rodent or snake hunting license
may also hunt and harvest attorneys
for recreational and sport (noncommercial)
purposes.
torneys within 100 yards of BMW,
370.02 Taking of attorneys with
traps or dead-falls is permitted. The
use of United States currency as bait,
however, is prohibited.
370.03 The willful killing of attorneys
with a motor vehicle is prohibited,
unless such vehicle is an ambulance
being driven in reverse. If an
attorney is accidentally struck by a
motor vehicle, the dead attorney
should be removed to the roadside,
and the vehicle should proceed
diately to the nearest car wash.
370.04 It is unlawful to chase, herd
or harvest attorneys from a power
boat, helicopter or aircraft.
370.05 It is unlawful to shout
“WHIPLASH! ” “AMBULANCE!”
or “FREE SCOTCH!” for the purposes
of trapping attorneys.
370.06 It is unlawful to hunt at-
Mercedes or Porsche dealerships, except
on Wednesday afternoon.
370.07 It is unlawful to hunt attorneys
within 200 yards of courtrooms,
law libraries, health clubs,
country clubs, hospitals or brothels.
370.08 If an attorney gains elective
office, it is not necessary to have a license
to hunt, trap or possess the same.
370.09 It is unlawful for a hunter
to wear a disguise as a reporter, accident
victim, physician, chiropractor or
tax accountant for the purpose of hunting
attorneys.
370.10 Bag and Possession Limits
per day: Yellow-bellied sidewinders,
2; Two-faced tortfeasors, 1; Backstabbing
divorce litigators, 3; Homrimmed
cut-throats, 2; Minutiae-advocating
dirtbags, 4. Honest attorneys
protected (Endangered Species Act).
ARS 8007.21 It is illegal to take
attorneys with a moving vehicle unless
there are no measurable skid
marks at the kill site.

iyaoyas
5 years 3 weeks ago, 6:55 PM

daisycutter

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Rank:
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Re: Attorney Hunting

Sorry it came out messed up,
maybe a MOD can delete it for me,
I hope :<)

iyaoyas
5 years 3 weeks ago, 6:56 PM

samD

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Thank you Daisycutter

I love this and will be the new sign on my ranch...

5 years 3 weeks ago, 7:00 PM

samD

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LLE

I think, on your reccomendation I will get the Bushnell Holo Sight. Have been reading up on it and it seems to do the trick...

p.s.

Going to Orlando for Christmas, 2 daughters down there. Not pulling the trailer this time. Will just drive and stay at Lowes Hotels. My middle daughter is comptroller of the 3 Hotels at Universal Studios, Orlando. I get the daddy rate. $50.00 a nite, my trip will be a little circituitous (sp or is even a word lol) but what the hell do I have but time.

5 years 3 weeks ago, 4:30 AM

LLE

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with the Bushnell HOLO. RE: going to Orlando--your route probably will be I10 East to I75 South. If so, you will be within 3 miles of our homestead off of I10,[NOT CIRCUITOUS] and are invited to stop by, rest and have a few Christmas libations. Also, we do not charge $50 a night.

Too old to fight, Too old to run, guess that's why I carry a gun! "would someone show this asshole the way out of town".[Rabbi Avram Belinski-aka "The Frisco Kid"]
5 years 3 weeks ago, 8:03 AM

samD

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LLE

Thank you for the kind and generous invitation for rest and a libation. We are still firming up plans and have a grandaughter at Univ of Fla. We will also be travelling with "Samantha the Wonder Dog" But I would love to meet someone older than myself and wiser. TT you later.

5 years 3 weeks ago, 8:36 AM

LLE

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but I got most of your post. U of F is in Gainsville, off of I 75. That is way past us. We are in Okaloosa County, about 45 miles east of Pensacola.
Comments: Older--Hell yes. Wiser--forget it. Samantha: should not be a problem. We have a nice, fenced back yard. Addie, the German Shepherd is territorial, but also obediant. Fastest way to make friends is to walk together around our neighborhood.

Too old to fight, Too old to run, guess that's why I carry a gun! "would someone show this asshole the way out of town".[Rabbi Avram Belinski-aka "The Frisco Kid"]
5 years 3 weeks ago, 9:08 AM

daisycutter

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Rank:
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Join Date:
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Location:
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is missing on our computers.
I also have Mozilla Firefox
on mine along with Internet
Explorer, with I.E. I am missing
the RH margin. With Firefox
the page is complete, nothing
missing. Some kind of prob with I.E. ??
I have been keeping the
sentences on my posts to the
left of center so they won't
be cut off.

iyaoyas
5 years 3 weeks ago, 9:10 AM

samD

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Rank:
President
Points:
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Join Date:
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Location:
Green Valley, Free State of Arizona, United States

Do you have a change zoom button on the bottom of your window? Try that.

5 years 3 weeks ago, 10:39 AM

daisycutter

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Rank:
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Join Date:
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http://www.joke-archives.com/lawyers/huntingattys.html

I don't have any display size
controls that I can locate. I
will ask (ax in ebonics) my
computer GooRoo about it tomorrow.
I think it is strange that I.E.
does that only on this site. After
the tech checks it out I'll post
what he says the reason is.

iyaoyas
5 years 3 weeks ago, 10:44 AM

samD

samD's picture

Rank:
President
Points:
15597
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Green Valley, Free State of Arizona, United States
Thanks Daisycutter

Generally it is pilot error...

5 years 3 weeks ago, 10:56 AM

daisycutter

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Rank:
General
Points:
4496
Join Date:
Jul 2009
Location:
Arkansas

Pilot Gripe: "AN/APS-80 fails to function in OFF MODE"
Repair Tech: Switched AN/APS-80 out of OFF MODE, functions normally".

DOH!!

iyaoyas

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