Forums / Political & Legal / A MESSAGE FROM THE PRESIDENT

4 years 47 weeks ago, 6:38 PM

Pkato

Pkato's picture

Rank:
General
Points:
3354
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Fort Walton Beach, Florida, United States

**THE WHITE HOUSE**

Dear Citizen,

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy and my over-spending, I have decided to implement a new scheme to require workers, age 50 and above, to accept retirement. As I have said before, it's time that this population be more accepting of the consequences of aging and not seek to greedily fill jobs that are needed by a younger more energetic population. This is the primary cause of the current unacceptably high unemployment.

This scheme will be known as *RAPE* (Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be *RAPED* can apply to Congress to be considered for the *SHAFT* program (Special Help After Forced Termination).

There will be a mandatory review of all Persons who have been *RAPED* and *SHAFTED* under the *SCREW* program (Scheme Covering Retired-Early Workers).

A person may be *RAPED* once, *SHAFTED* twice, and
*SCREWED* as many times as I, President Obama, deems appropriate.

Persons who have been *RAPED* or *SCREWED* could get *AIDS*
(Additional Income for Dependants & Spouse) or *HERPES*
(Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).

Persons who have *AIDS* or *HERPES* will not be *SHAFTED* or *SCREWED* any further.

Persons who are not *RAPE* qualified and have no skill will receive as much *SHIT* (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. I have always prided myself on the amount of
*SHIT* I give our citizens.

Should you feel that you are not receiving enough *SHIT*, please bring this to the attention of your Congressman, who has been specially trained to give you all the *SHIT* you can handle.

Sincerely, President Barack H. Obama

PS: Due to the recent landmark legislation making it illegal to use electricity, gas, and oil, or coal because of the need to eliminate carbon emissions, the Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.

Patrolman Kato
Firearms stand next in importance to the Constitution itself.
They are the American people's liberty teeth and keystone
under independence. -- George Washington
4 years 47 weeks ago, 6:42 PM

zx12rmike

zx12rmike's picture

Rank:
President Pro Temp
Points:
7870
Join Date:
Dec 2008
Location:
commiefornia, United States

PKato, Thanks, I'll be 50 in Feb!

"We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home" Thomas Jefferson
4 years 47 weeks ago, 7:05 PM

Pkato

Pkato's picture

Rank:
General
Points:
3354
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Fort Walton Beach, Florida, United States
I wll be 50 in Sep

Congrats, you made it this far!

Patrolman Kato
Firearms stand next in importance to the Constitution itself.
They are the American people's liberty teeth and keystone
under independence. -- George Washington
4 years 47 weeks ago, 7:06 PM

zx12rmike

zx12rmike's picture

Rank:
President Pro Temp
Points:
7870
Join Date:
Dec 2008
Location:
commiefornia, United States
Young whipper snapper!

Young whipper snapper!

"We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home" Thomas Jefferson
4 years 47 weeks ago, 7:32 PM

Pkato

Pkato's picture

Rank:
General
Points:
3354
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Fort Walton Beach, Florida, United States
Birthday Wishes

I expect everyone on this site to wish us or at least the Prez should post a message for our birthdays, only because this is our 50th coming up...it's a momentous event. Just think, we turn 50 the same year that the Dems get shocked at the voting booth!!! I just hope I don't get a mortar on my hooch before September!!!

Patrolman Kato
Firearms stand next in importance to the Constitution itself.
They are the American people's liberty teeth and keystone
under independence. -- George Washington
4 years 45 weeks ago, 2:02 AM

luckybychoice

luckybychoice's picture


Rank:
Secretary of the Treasury
Points:
6791
Join Date:
May 2009
Location:
United States
I had

a hell of a party when i turned 50,the driveway was Harley parking only and if my pollutted memory serves me right we went thru 20 cases of beer and made a beer run for 10 more,don't threaten me with a good time.

i tried being reasonable,i didn't like it, NRA LIFE MEMBER,USMC VETERAN
4 years 47 weeks ago, 7:37 PM

zx12rmike

zx12rmike's picture

Rank:
President Pro Temp
Points:
7870
Join Date:
Dec 2008
Location:
commiefornia, United States

Because I am already claiming Old Timers, I hope to remember to wish you a Happy Birthday!

"We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home" Thomas Jefferson
4 years 47 weeks ago, 8:26 PM

greg az

greg az's picture

Rank:
Secretary of Homeland Security
Points:
5873
Join Date:
Oct 2009
Location:
New York, NY, Tunisia

Your a kid, and bank turn around and all around you are younger than you.. Anyway early BD good wishes to ya guy..

a man has to hold his word, hold his beliefs, and hold a good sight picture.
4 years 47 weeks ago, 8:29 PM

zx12rmike

zx12rmike's picture

Rank:
President Pro Temp
Points:
7870
Join Date:
Dec 2008
Location:
commiefornia, United States

Thanks greg, I'm just amazed how fast I got here after getting married and having kids.

"We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home" Thomas Jefferson
4 years 47 weeks ago, 8:28 PM

runawaygun762

runawaygun762's picture

Rank:
Vice President
Points:
8929
Join Date:
Nov 2008
Location:
Richland, MO, United States
Just think, mike

five more years and you get the senior citizen discount at Captain D's.

"I have always been a soldier. I have known no other life. The calling of arms, I have followed from boyhood. I have never sought another." From The Virtues of War, by Steven Pressfield.
4 years 47 weeks ago, 8:30 PM

zx12rmike

zx12rmike's picture

Rank:
President Pro Temp
Points:
7870
Join Date:
Dec 2008
Location:
commiefornia, United States

Hell, I'm looking forward to the discounts! I'm also looking forward to when the kids MOVE OUT?

"We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home" Thomas Jefferson
4 years 47 weeks ago, 8:33 PM

runawaygun762

runawaygun762's picture

Rank:
Vice President
Points:
8929
Join Date:
Nov 2008
Location:
Richland, MO, United States
Am I a bad person?

I'm looking forward to 2021 when my child support is up and 2025 when my boy is out.

"I have always been a soldier. I have known no other life. The calling of arms, I have followed from boyhood. I have never sought another." From The Virtues of War, by Steven Pressfield.
4 years 47 weeks ago, 8:53 PM

greg az

greg az's picture

Rank:
Secretary of Homeland Security
Points:
5873
Join Date:
Oct 2009
Location:
New York, NY, Tunisia
runaway... NOPE

better honest than anything else, and thats all your being..

a man has to hold his word, hold his beliefs, and hold a good sight picture.
4 years 47 weeks ago, 9:00 PM

luckybychoice

luckybychoice's picture


Rank:
Secretary of the Treasury
Points:
6791
Join Date:
May 2009
Location:
United States
It never ends runny

the kids cost more as time goes on,there is no relief in sight for you,give up all hope now,happy fucking new year!

i tried being reasonable,i didn't like it, NRA LIFE MEMBER,USMC VETERAN
4 years 47 weeks ago, 9:03 PM

zx12rmike

zx12rmike's picture

Rank:
President Pro Temp
Points:
7870
Join Date:
Dec 2008
Location:
commiefornia, United States

Amen Boss, Happy Damn New Year to EVERYONE!

"We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home" Thomas Jefferson
4 years 47 weeks ago, 2:11 PM

Pkato

Pkato's picture

Rank:
General
Points:
3354
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Fort Walton Beach, Florida, United States
runaway

You better hope your kids are not liberals...or they will cost you until you are 70, and maybe even sue you for fucking them up...haha

Patrolman Kato
Firearms stand next in importance to the Constitution itself.
They are the American people's liberty teeth and keystone
under independence. -- George Washington
4 years 46 weeks ago, 6:45 PM

Anonymous

2040

I will not be "Raped","Shafted"and will avoid"Aids","Herpies" and Will not be "Shit" on by Barack "Heisinsane" Obama due to him not being president any longer. Bring on 50!

4 years 46 weeks ago, 3:43 PM

Nitris

Nitris's picture

Rank:
Lieutenant General
Points:
1913
Join Date:
Nov 2008
Location:
You will be

You will be "Raped","Shafted"and will receive "Aids","Herpies" and Will be "Shit" on by Barack "Heisinsane" Obama due to him being president Now . You wont make 50!

Ron Paul 2012 III
4 years 46 weeks ago, 4:07 PM

Anonymous

Nitris

I now know why your dog looks like that. Its due to being "Raped","Shafted" getting "Aids","Herpies" and being shit on barack heisinsane obama.....poor dog. And yes as long as barack is pres. I may not see 50....

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