Forums / Strategies, Tactics & Training / Military Rules & Sensitivity Training

5 years 34 weeks ago, 10:29 AM

samD

samD's picture

Rank:
President
Points:
15597
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Green Valley, Free State of Arizona, United States

Marine Corps Rules:

1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.
3. Have a plan.
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.
5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a '4.'
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal preferred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
11. Always cheat, always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.

Navy SEAL Rules:

1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
2. Kill every living thing within view.
3. Adjust Speedo.
4. Check hair in mirror.

US Army Ranger Rules:

1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound rucksack while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from 'Higher' to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.

US Army Rules:

1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.
2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.
3. Curse bitterly.
4. Curse bitterly.
5. Do not listen to 2nd LTs; it can get you killed.
6. Curse bitterly.

US Air Force Rules:

1. Have a cocktail.
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
3. See what's on HBO.
4. Ask: What is a gunfight
5. Request more funding from Congress with a 'killer' Power Point presentation.
6. Wine & dine 'key' Congressmen, invite DOD & defense industry executives.
7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.
8. Declare the assets 'strategic' and never deploy them operationally.
9. Hurry to make 13:45 tee-time.
10. Make sure the base is as far as possible from the conflict but close
enough to have tax exemption.

US Navy Rules:

1. Go to Sea.
2. Drink Coffee.
3. Deploy the Marines..

All: U.S. Navy Directive 16134 (Inappropriate T-Shirts)

The following directive was issued by the commanding officer of all naval
installations in the Middle East . (It was obviously directed at the Marines.)

To: All Commands
Subject: Inappropriate T-Shirts
Ref: ComMidEast For Inst 16134//24K

All commanders promulgate upon receipt. The following T-shirts are no longer to be worn on
or off base by any military or civilian personnel serving in the Middle East:

1. 'Eat Pork or Die' [both English and Arabic versions]
2. 'Shrine Busters' [Various. Show burning minarets or bomb/artillery shells impacting Islamic
shrines. Some with unit logos.]
3. 'Napalm, Sticks Like Crazy' [Both English and Arabic versions]
4. 'Goat - it isn't just for breakfast anymore.' [Both English and Arabic versions]
5. 'The road to Paradise begins with me.'[Mostly Arabic versions, but some in English.
Some show sniper scope cross-hairs. ]
6. 'Guns don't kill people. I kill people.' [Both Arabic and English versions]
7.. 'Pork. The other white meat.' [Arabic version]
8. 'Infidel' [English, Arabic and other coalition force languages.]

The above T-shirts are to be removed from Post Exchanges upon receipt of this directive.

In addition, the following signs are to be removed upon receipt of this message:

1. 'Islamic Religious Services Will Be Held at the Firing Range at 0800 Daily.'
2. 'Do we really need 'smart bombs' to drop on these dumb bastards'

All commands are instructed to implement sensitivity training upon receipt

If you know a vet or military dependent in need call 1 888 777 4443 National Veteran's Foundation

5 years 34 weeks ago, 10:41 AM

Ironkoji

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Apr 2009
Location:
Dallas, TX

To contact Somali pirates: dial 1-800-r-matey.

Koji

5 years 34 weeks ago, 10:51 AM

samD

samD's picture

Rank:
President
Points:
15597
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Green Valley, Free State of Arizona, United States
I love it Koji

LOL

5 years 34 weeks ago, 10:54 AM

birdebyrd

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Rank:
Brigadier General
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320
Join Date:
Feb 2009
Location:
50 Miles WEST of the Atlantic, GA

That's why I joined nothin much has changed in 24 years

Feedin' the till, for the "Stimulus" Bill (since 1974)
5 years 34 weeks ago, 10:56 AM

charley9toe

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Rank:
Lieutenant General
Points:
1114
Join Date:
Mar 2009
It's good

Both instructive and humorous. I hope u don't run out of this stuff. I might actually have to get too some of my projects.

(You have to look behind all of that outer space stuff)
5 years 34 weeks ago, 12:40 PM

fordvg

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Points:
5761
Join Date:
Oct 2008
Location:
Fancy Farm, Kentucky, United States

Both are very funny. Loved it and ROFLOL. Yes, have to love us Marines and the way we think.

"WAR IS A RACKET, I spent most of my time being a high-class muscle-man for Big Business, for Wall Street, and for the Bankers." Major-General Smedley Darlington Butler USMC Ret. 2 time Medal of Honor winner.
5 years 33 weeks ago, 4:29 PM

Pkato

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Rank:
General
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3354
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Fort Walton Beach, Florida, United States
Great Sam

very funny...

PKato

Patrolman Kato
Firearms stand next in importance to the Constitution itself.
They are the American people's liberty teeth and keystone
under independence. -- George Washington
5 years 33 weeks ago, 4:44 PM

Pkato

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Rank:
General
Points:
3354
Join Date:
Aug 2008
Location:
Fort Walton Beach, Florida, United States

ridiculous though, especially for someone like me, because I am sensitive mother f'er!

Photobucket

Patrolman Kato
Firearms stand next in importance to the Constitution itself.
They are the American people's liberty teeth and keystone
under independence. -- George Washington
5 years 33 weeks ago, 8:54 PM

DEMO

DEMO's picture

Rank:
Lieutenant General
Points:
1268
Join Date:
Oct 2008
Location:
Hamburg, NY

I spent 5 years in a combat group, crosstrained to another combat group while in the air force. We ate, slept and trained with all the Army and Marines.
THEN I went into the medical squadron (because there are no jobs on the outside blowing shit up). I was stationed at Andrews AFB MD. It was a country club. 9-5, HBO, AC and tons of 18-24 year old women. We had a golf course, weight rooms, incredible food and just a party. I could have retired at Andrews. Never worked a weekend, never had PT. The chow hall actually was better than any resturaunt. Steak and shrimp night.
WOW

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do

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