Alternative Ways To Say No :
I'd rather have my nipples chewed off...by a pack of wild dogs.
I'd rather suck the snot out of a gorilla's nose...until the back of
his head caves in!
I would rather crush my foreskin between two tables while being bitch whipped by a fat, mustached geek named Spyros.
I'd rather drink a gallon of turpentine...and piss on a forest fire.
I'd rather suck cow snot...through a straw.
I'd rather watch Rosie O'Donnell and Roseanne mud wrestle... in the nude.
I'd rather bungee jump...with the harness tied to my penis...with your mom lying naked in the landing zone.
I would rather spend ten hours getting a tattoo on my back...and then find out it's the wrong one.
I'd rather have the ten strongest 300 pound linemen in the NFL play tug of war with my nut sack....each side of 5 pulling a separate nut in a different direction.
I would rather have my lower legs stripped with a wood planer...and then wear wool socks...in August.
I'd rather stick my nose up someone's ass...after he just finished taking a shit.
I'd rather shave my poison-ivy covered legs ... with a dull barber's razor...and no water or soap.
I'd rather french kiss a barracuda.
I'd rather butt fuck a rattlesnake... in a phone booth.
I'd rather nail my dick to the middle of a 2x4 and set both ends on fire...and try to get loose with a butter knife.
I would rather have sex with Pee Wee Herman in the daylight, without a bag to put over his head.
I'd rather drink for a week from the septic tank...of the 700 pound man next door.
I'd rather wipe my anus with barbed wire.
I'd rather insert and break a slender glass rod in my penis... then tie it in a knot.
I'd rather lick an elephant's asshole...after he had just dropped a load of steaming diarrhea.
I'd rather run naked through a rosebush garden...then jump into a pool filled with chlorine.
l would rather lie under an elephant with diarrhea...in August...with my mouth propped open.
I'd rather ride a donkey naked through the desert...with snapping turtles attached to my nipples.
I'd rather be tied to a chair...and forced to listen to Barry Manilow tunes..while having my tonsils removed with a rusty spoon.